i can see clearly now the rain is here

nasty, cold, blustery day in new jack. this morning, i finally took marge's incessant advice about seeing an ophTHALMOLOgist, not my opTOMetrist of ten years. fine, saw this guy who turned out to be a hot piece of italian ass (SO usually not my type, but hello guido...) prescription barely changed, but changed nevertheless...
'any problems with your sight?'
'sort of. i can't understand why, but some contacts from the box are crystal clear, and some just don't correct my vision. bizarre.'
'who makes them?'
'clinasoft.'
'who?'
'clinasoft?'
'what the hell is that?'
'um, if you don't know... hold on, i brought the boxes...'
'wow. these. now i know. these are the knock-offs to the ones i'm going to prescribe.'
'knock offs, like as in 'that's not a rolex!''
'sort of. let me explain.'
[clinical mumbo jumbo] '...same packaging, same font, everything, so that's why you can't always see.'
'oh. lovely. and, since we're talking about things that help me see, or don't, lasik...?'
[clinical mumbo jumbo] '...about four thousand dollars.'
'hail mary!'
'don't take mary's name!' [something in italian, ending with him crossing himself.]
'sorry. yes. i apologize. so, four thousand...'
'but i use the latest in lasers.' [clinical mumbo jumbo.]

so we agree that a few months worth of contacts is a good deal, lest i pimp myself out (again) to pay for lasik, and he gives me the prescription for new glasses. go to cute optometrist place near me with uber, uber adorable guy behind the counter...

'oh, those are cute, may i see?' [dripping rainwater over his just. so. perfect. display case.]
'yes, they are paul chiol.'
'who? ooh, they're mad cute!'
'and they bring out your lashes.'
'sorry?'
'sorry.'
'no, don't be sorry. how much are these with my 'insurance?''
'[*cha ching*]'
'now you need to be sorry.'
'yeah, those are a bit steep.'
'make a deal? [wink]'
'yeah, with your amex. sorry, stud. [shy grin.]'
'ok, but let me write the style and price down.'

...to be continued...